February 2021

 Mountain high, valley low

The month of February was short, but pretty intense. Not only in nice, lovely ways, but sometimes also in sad, scary ways. But hey, that's life and that's what we all go through.

First and foremost - Denmark was in a Lockdown in February, still. Which means that no stores are opened, no school and such. So, I worked from home for the office, where I had some administrative tasks, like correcting things on one of our websites. I really got used to me being very flexible in when I do what, so I'm curious how it will be back at the office, where I have fixer working hours. 

Nevertheless, I got to help at the second hand shop, now thursdays and fridays, as there was still a lot to do. I cleaned up, sorted out and put prices on stuff. Even though it was a little quiet and chill without the customers, I realised that it really does me well to be there and help there more physically. 

part of my tasks - taking pictures and putting them on Facebook

Actually, there is one day which I will never forget. Two colleagues and me drove out to the apartment of an elderly lady, who just passed away. Her daugthers were there and we got to have everything left in that home - such as furniture, books, decorations, lamps and dishes. The daughters could have sold all of that things for quite an amount of money, but they decided to donate it to us. Everyone was excited to see the things we bring home and I was happy to have experienced this kind of atmosphere. 

This month there was also a lot going on on Zoom - starting with me presenting Kontakt mellem Mennesker in a livestream about Dansk ICYE in Slovakia. It was interesting to see how such online things work and I gladly introduced my project in hope of having a new, kind face here in September. 

Furthermore, I had my Midterm Evaluation Training hosted by ICYE. I'm not going to lie, it kind of made me sad, as it marked the middle of my stay here in Denmark. Despite that, it was great to see the other volunteers again (online, though) and to share our experiences and challenges. Once again it made me realise where I stand in life and where I want to go. I remember one coaching talk I had with a fellow volunteer from Germany, where we talked about our biggest challenge here and we had one of the most beautiful and inspiring conversations I have ever had. 

our social event evening

Additionally, I have attended a webinar called "Promoting gender equality through voluntary work" hosted by Grenzenlos, the Austrian ICYE. It lasted two weekends and was full of inspiring, sweet and interesting discussions about gender (identity, equality and inequality. On the second weekend we sadly split into two groups, but it still was a great experience. People attended from all over the world - Germany, Austria, Greece, Lebanon, Belgium,...

the people focussing on voluntary work

I need to talk about the Danish weather here for a second, as I think I hav lived through all of the four seasons this month. We went from stormy snow days to foggy wet days to rain to sunshine. It was quite weird to keep track of the weather, as it changed what felt like every hour. But, luckily I adjusted to the weird condition - with layering my clothes!

What is also weird is the fact that days in particular feel extremely long, but looking back time flies like it cannot be stopped. Weird. 

the snow we had in the beggining

sometimes it was pretty and warm 

and other times you couldn't see where you were going

In my host family we have a great time. I sometimes bake cakes, but honestly, the last one this month was a disaster. But there was also a great one, so I could accept my shame. In addition, I contribute to our mealplan by cooking once a week, which is actually a really fun thing to do (I never thought that I would say that ever in my life).

the good cake I made

Sadly, there were some people looking at our house and it seems like they want to buy it, for real. This means I will have to move to another family pretty soon, which isn't that hard to do, it's just a little sad to me to leave my current one. On the other hand, we all knew this day may come, so I'm not stressed or anxious, which is very good. 

I generally had some pretty rough days this month because of some issues at home. It was the helplessness and the unknown that really scared me and made me sad. Sometimes I even felt like I should be back in Austria, and it is totally okay to feel overwhelmed and powerless once in a while. It's human. I realised, that talking about problems and issues to my mentor and my host mother were the things that helped me to cope with all of my challenges until now. Thus, I am extremely thankful for their support at all times, especially in hard ones.

As it is the middle of my stay, I dedicated some time to my search for university and what I want to study. So far, I have signed up for biomedical engineering. Soon enough I will be signing up for pharmacy and food- and biotechnology. It's kind of scary to think about all that jazz, but it has to be done sooner or later.

Despite the lockdown, I was able to visit my mentor at her home to spend a wonderful afternoon handcrafting, eating and walking their dog. I really needed that time with her and we hade very sweet talks. She empowers me more every day.

at my mentor's house

There is also a volunteer from Costa Rica at Genbrugskontakten, Valeria. We were at the beach one day to get to know each other better and I feel like we get along really well. Also, I think we work together pretty well when it comes to sorting clothes in the basement of the second hand shop.

Last but not least, I met up with Karen and Rosa finally again. I have really missed those two together, as we always have a lot of fun. We hope to see each other more regularly again, as the restricitons will be a little eased at the beginning of March. 

Some days I have these random outbursts of confidence, where I genuinely feel good and enjoy my own company in an overly intense way than other days. And some days I feel so overwhelmed by the future and things that are going on that I cannot seem to focus on anything. I don't know where these intensive feelings come from, but I guess I cannot do anything about them anyways, so why not just roll with it?

I just wanted to have this picture in here - it's andesteg, duck with different things - pretty danish!

Negative:

• the great changes in the weather messing with my mood
• feeling exhausted a lot
• being afraid of what the future holds
• random and intense, but short periods of sadness
• all of the many Coronatests I have taken

Positive:

• empowering talks with different people
• watching the Danish TV series Badehotellet with my host father
• being supported by my friends here in Denmark
• that one evening I was ice-skating here in Ollerup
• visiting my mentor
• trying winter bathing for the first time
• my host mother bringin me a shot in one of my online Danish classes
• Genbrugskontakten will be opening again in the beginning of March
• biking to work for the first time this year